The #1 BIGGEST Way to Kill Your Motivation to Make Healthy Changes (+ how to conquer it)

Do you keep going around in circles, unable to stay motivated to make healthy changes? You might be killing your own motivation. Click to read the full post and get access to the free weekly FB series.

When you hear people talk about eating healthy and exercising, do you roll your eyes and think "ya, ya - I know what to do, I'm just not doing it," and then tune out? salad... 

...stop drinking soda...

....stop eating junk food...

...go to the gym...

Yup. I've heard it before. And there's a reason I'm not doing it. IT ALL SOUNDS MISERABLE! Not worth it. (So please stop talking about it.)

Guess what? That bad attitude of yours is KILLING your motivation. I don't blame you. The way people talk about "healthy lifestyles" isn't always appealing. People might be talking about healthy habits, but I bet this is what you're actually hearing: 

...starve yourself... boring, bland food...

...deprive yourself...

...kill your body (or at least feel like it)...

If that doesn't already sound horrible enough, what makes it worse is that you're probably betting that all of that miserable stuff isn't even going to get you results. At least not ones that stick. So why deprive yourself, eat like a rabbit, be cranky and feel so sore that you can't even sit down to pee if all it's going to get you is a bad attitude and no lost weight? 

And if you did want to lose weight, you would know what to do, right? WRONG!

The absolute #1 offender that makes people lose motivation for healthy changes is thinking "I already know how."


First off, diets suck. I'm not a fan and I'm never going to tell you to go eat weird foods or deprive yourself (or go on any diet). Second, you need to be realistic. If "you already know" what to do, but you aren't doing it (for very understandable reasons), there's probably something you don't actually know yet. 

Also, if everything you've tried in the past has just left you hungry, craving and miserable, obviously something wasn't right. You need to learn what your actual starting point is and start to change your outlook on a healthy lifestyle.

Lucky for you, I'm hosting a weekly Facebook live series all about finding realistic motivation for a healthy lifestyle. Register below and join me every Friday @ 12pm MST/2pm EST. Plus, I'll send you a free Motivation Checklist when you register.

What "knowing how" gets you:

Our mental capacity is faaar beyond our physical capacity. What does that mean? Just because you "understand" something, doesn't mean you actually get it. Let's look at a real-life example:

Have you ever played Wii tennis -- and crushed it?? You understand the basic movements, the angles, the timing. Psh. Why do people think tennis is so hard? So you challenge your dad (who's played his whole life) to a tennis match. You even do a little extra internet research to make sure you get the techniques down so you have the upper hand. I mean, Google does know everything. You walk onto the court with all the arrogance in the world because you've got this! Plus, there's the whole competition element of beating your dad who thinks he's so good (riiight - he won't even know what hit him. muhaha). Game on.

First serve.

You don't even get near the ball. ...Uh... awkward. It's ok, it was just a warm-up.

Second serve. 

Your racket makes contact with the ball. [crushed it!] Wait... the ball just flew over the fence. 

You scratch your head: TOTALLY confused (and suddenly humbled). 

(by the way, this actually happened to my brother!)

You see, there's a huge difference between studying -- "knowing" what to do and actually putting it into practice. Mentally, you can study all you want. You can understand all the techniques, best practices and history behind tennis, but that doesn't mean you actually know how to play.  

Another example? Same thing goes for travelling. Have you ever read a great book about China (or London or Australia or any other awesome place)? The author describes the city, the smells, the sounds -- so perfectly that you feel like you're there. You feel like you know the city, the people, the country. You could probably convince someone that you've been there. But you haven't. And chances are, if you visit London, you're going to run into some surprises. 

Doing is far different than knowing!

And that's ok. We're going to figure this out together. 

What "actually doing" gets you: 

Um, success. Duh? Ok, that was too easy. 

But for real, are any of these appealing to you: 

  • Actually getting your dream body (without Photoshop).
  • Eating real, healthy food that tastes great. 
  • Having more energy because you're in good shape. 
  • Being able to join any physical activity you're invited to (because you can).
  • Indulging in your favorite dessert and smirking when people look confused because you look so good.
  • Decreasing your chances of preventable diseases like diabetes & heart disease.
  • Being and feeling more confident.

If any of those things sound like what you want for your life, you're in luck! You can totally get each one of those. That's why I love DOING. DOING makes your dreams come true.

Doing means actually getting your dream body instead of just dreaming about your dream body. It means feeling confident and knowing that you've worked for your success and even though it may have been hard at times, it was totally worth it!

Knowing = dreaming, wishing, hoping, daydreaming, learning, etc. It's really all the theory stuff, and don't get me wrong, it's great to have some background. But none of it is tangible.

But DOING!? Doing = changes, accomplishments, confidence, success.

You tell me which one you want. I want the real stuff. 

Ya sure - taking action sucks sometimes. I've been there too. Action requires work. And sometimes that work requires uncomfortable changes. It's hard to make changes especially when you've seen other people try and fail in the past. It can be especially hard to make changes if YOU'VE tried and failed before. 

But failed diets aren't your fault! False perceptions aren't your fault. There are too many people saying "be healthy" without providing any type of guidance or explanation. There are too many missing steps.

I want to help you fill in the gaps. I want to help you actually take one step at a time so you can create a healthy lifestyle. It starts with knowing your starting point (how can you show up for a race if you don't know where the race is being held?) It then goes from starting point to changes to successes to habits and finally to a full-blown healthy lifestyle that becomes second-nature.

Steps for a healthy lifestyle

When you take action, you actually have the ability to turn your dreams into reality. And that's not a catch phrase. Taking action means taking control.

You want to be in shape? Make it happen.

You don't know where to start? Let me help you.

Join me every Friday for real talk about getting motivated for a healthy lifestyle. You can meet other people just like you who are busy and realistic - and still want to make healthy changes. Here's your chance to START DOING SOMETHING about your goals! And of course the best part is that it's free. I know, I'm awesome, right? lol for real though, you should register and join me - it'll be educational and hopefully entertaining (fingers crossed!)

Bridging the gap: 

Ok, so we're convinced that doing is better than just knowing (at least I hope we are). And it's obvious that if we want to actually accomplish our goals, we have to do something about them. Now what? 

Now we have to bridge that gap. Here are the 3 steps you should take to bridge the gap: 

Step 1: Evaluate your starting point

What are you actually, currently doing? Before you can start taking any effective action, you have to be realistic about where you're starting. You probably already know your goals. Goals are important - they help give us direction, clarity, and remind us of our motivation to keep going.

However, you're not starting at your end goal. None of us are. There's no shame in that. Where are you starting? 

Take the time to evaluate: 

  • Your eating habits
  • Your exercise habits
  • Your sleeping habits
  • Your attitude
  • Your goals

The more honest you are with yourself as to what you're actually, currently doing, the more effective this step will be. You don't even have to tell anyone what your starting point is, so there's no reason to hold back. But, you should at least write it down. Be accountable to yourself. 

How much time and/or work is required to get you from where you are now to where you want to be? This is all part of knowing your starting point. If you're looking for some extra, detailed guidance, be sure to register for my live weekly series: Real talk about motivation for a healthy lifestyle. It'll be worth your time.

Step 2: Get help bridging your gaps

Now that you've identified your "gaps," it's time to get a little help. Even if it's short term help, get help with the things you aren't doing yet. You can (and probably should) transition to doing it on your own later. But for now, you just need to recognize that if you aren't doing it, you probably need a little help getting started. And that's TOTALLY OK! 

I know this first-hand. Remember? I promised to teach you what I know first-hand. So I get that it can be hard to ask for help.

When I decided to drop 30 pounds and get back into shape, I had a really hard time asking for help, let alone paying for it! I found a small boot-camp gym that was really good and also really expensive ($150/month). At first, I just couldn't rationalize spending that kind of money when I knew how to workout. I knew how to get in a good, hard workout. I was an athlete. Why would I pay someone that. much. money. to help me workout? 

I did end up paying $150/month for that gym and here's why: I wasn't paying just to workout. I was paying someone to help me get on track. I wanted my life back. I wanted my confidence back and I wanted my health back. Was a 3x a week workout worth $150/month? Maybe. But my life, confidence, health, motivation and focus - 100% worth it. (And let me assure you - I was NOT rolling in the dough. I just decided that it was important so I re-budgeted and changed where I was spending my money.)

As much as "I knew" what to do, the fact was, I wasn't doing it! Not only would it help me to attend these small group training's, but at $150/month, you better believe I made sure to get my butt out of bed and show up!

Step 3: Transition from help to self-help 

Once you've started getting the swing of things, you can wean yourself off of the outside help. Learn how to eat healthy and exercise on your own. Once you've taught yourself how to successfully live a healthy lifestyle, do some evaluating:

  • Evaluate how much effort will it take to be successful on your own?
  • How much will it cost?
  • How much time will it take?
  • All things considered, would you prefer to help yourself or pay someone to help you?

Your decision. 

Choosing to pay someone to help you because you'd rather spend your time elsewhere is totally different than paying someone because you don't know how to help yourself. 

So why go through this process if you might end up paying someone anyway? 

Because life. Life happens and you won't always have someone around to help you.

What happens when you travel? When your trainer/instructor goes out of town? Or moves? What happens when you move? By making the transition to self-help, you'll always be able to stay fit. Even if you end up paying someone, you'll still know how to keep yourself fit when you don't have help around. And believe me, it's far easier to learn that lesson while you have the time, rather than when you're inundated with packing, wrapping up loose ends, booking travel, etc. If you don't learn now, you won't end up learning then. Instead, you'll use your travel/move/etc. as an excuse. 

In short:

  • Recognize that there is a HUGE difference between "knowing" and "doing." They are NOT the same thing and it's ok if they don't line up.
  • Resist the temptation to fall into the "I already know how" trap that ends up just turning into another excuse to put off making healthy changes.
  • Know that diets fail for a reason and the exact reasons diets fail are why healthy habits don't.
  • Take time to honestly evaluate what you want, where you're starting, and where you could use help.
  • Then get the help you need closing those "gaps," learn to keep healthy habits on your own and evaluate what best fits your lifestyle.
  • Register for the free weekly series via Facebook live. It's all about realistic motivation so you can actually create a healthy lifestyle. Plus, you'll also get a free Motivation Checklist when you register.